PAY ATTENTION FELLAS: We normally SUCK at this part in a relationship. Take notes, your partner will love you for it.
One of the most important things to have in your relationship is good communication. There are going to be times in your life when communicating to your partner could end up saving you a lot of hassle and sleepless nights on the couch. You have to realize that if you don�t talk about your differences or issues in a conversational tone, you are going to end up making things even worse for a bit of time. Things like that happen way too often in relationships, and it's up to you to put a stop to it so that the two of you can be happy gain.
How many times have you had the chance to tell your partner that they were doing something you didn�t like and it ended up in a heated argument? This type of thing happens to everyone, and there is no way of telling when the next big blow out is going to happen. You just have to be prepared for anything that might be said and figure out a way of getting around the harsher aspects of that argument the best way that you can. But you shouldn�t let things sit inside and build up, either.
If you absolutely need to tell your partner how you feel about something, then you have to do it in a way that doesn�t cause them to become defensive. Defensiveness makes a conversation become one sided and that will get you nowhere fast. You will end up yelling at each other and throwing blame around like water on a house fire. The only problem is you will only have a tiny tea cup of water and that fire will continue to flame out of control every time you toss more water on it. You have to be able to stop an argument before it gets to that point.
There really is no reason for anyone to argue. Most civilized people are able to have a conversation and point out ways that things could be better for both parties. You have to think in those terms and realize that most of the issues you are having with your partner have something to do with the way you are acting as well. You need to take responsibility for the things that you are doing wrong and try to resolve them in a way that makes your partner happy before you start pointing fingers at them.
Everyone has failings with who they are, and there are a lot of couples that don�t agree on things in life. This is something that you are just going to have to accept and live with if you want your relationship to work out for the best. But that doesn�t mean you can't bring some things up that you would like your partner to change and ask them what you could change about yourself to make things a bit more even. Compromise is a key ingredient to communication and it's something you are going to find yourself doing quite a bit of in the future if you want your relationship to work.
